Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

I remember a small, white spherical object quickly moving towards me.

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

My father was launching heaters at me, full speed.

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

I remember being afraid, I was six then, you see, and something coming that fast and that hard with that type of movement was terrifying.

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

I didn’t realize it then, but he was trying to teach me something, and it wasn’t the meaning of pain. I do remember the panic as the ball came hurtling towards me, sometimes with some hardcore tailing action…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

I also remember the panic washing over my body as it came closer, fear that I would drop the ball, fear that it would hit me somewhere it really hurts, or the worse fear yet…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…dropping it. I was always afraid of disappointing dear old dad, and nothing was worse in our family dynamic than failing to catch a ball. Through and through though, the message was not simply “see ball, catch ball”…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…it was deeper than that. It was a meaning that I was mulling over as we worked together to change my oil…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…the same meaning that came to me as we were desperately trying to plunge a clog in our sink, me on one side, him on the other, methodically pumping the plunger and praying to the home improvement Gods simultaneously…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…no, the lesson wasn’t ever as simple as “see ball, catch ball,” it was no matter how difficult something may seem at first, no matter how scary something is, no matter how impossible you think a goal is to reach…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…with a little time and a lot of effort, those things become easier, more familiar, more possible. With time I started catching the ball, and pretty soon it was he who lived in fear of my fastball.

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

But when I see kids playing catch with their dads on TV, in the movies, in my local park, something seems different about the whole thing. While I’m sure that they are connecting, I know that our connection is different…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…that he taught me something that day. After that spring spent mostly on a dewy field or out in front of our house in Cicero, I wasn’t afraid of the ball anymore…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…nor was I afraid of the other team, of life, of heights, of anything that I was mortified of before then. I’m still not, and I have…

Swoooooooossshhh…thwap!

…that to thank for it.